Self-destruct; these are powerful words, yet an even more threatening way of life for so many. I was struck by this thought the other day after a long, draining day. I had a cut of meat that I had never eaten and/or cooked before. After spending time cooking it, the meat ended up being as rubbery as my front tire and as red as my cheeks after a day in the west Texas sun. I was frustrated, tired, and hungry. With the clock reading 9:45 p.m. at this point, I simply gave in. I quit.
It was then that I began to long for what I could not have, something bad. All I wanted was a slice of bread, a piece of cake, something!! In my mind, I began to self-destruct. Reaching in the fridge for a sugar-free jello, I spooned down the wiggly, jiggly nonsense as I battled in my mind. Was it worth it to cave in? Would I backtrack for just a split second to satisfy some small craving of the flesh? Would it be worth it in the end? I began to think about all of the hard work I had put in thus far, every tear, every drop of sweat, every no to temptation that knocked on my door.
I wonder how many of us self-destruct in such moments. Oh sure, it looks different for everyone. Some self-destruct their bodies through alcohol abuse or nicotine use, some through food addiction and/or starvation, some in just their very thoughts of themselves...self-loathing and self-hatred. Yet, in those noisy moments of battle and destruction, there is still a greater voice that calls out louder...one of confidence and strength. It's the champion within that beckons us to stop, to just wait, dig deeper and push harder. And soon enough, what was once a moment of self-destruction is now a lifetime of overcoming. With the grace and strength of Jesus, every self-destructer can become an overcomer...it's just a matter of which voice you are listening to.
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