It's been a LONG time since I have written, and while writers certainly go through seasons, it's great to be hitting these keys again to put some thoughts on the screen. Today's post will be short but sweet, and it's for all of my fans, friends, and those who have been with me on the journey thus far.
I simply wanted to say thank you. It's funny how two words can seem so incredibly inadequate at times. Words carry such power and yet, at times, they oft fail us. Yet in some feeble attempt, I want to express my gratitude for you, thanking the Lord each day for you. Waves of thankfulness have encompassed me as I have reflected on the journey thus far, a journey that began not too long ago and yet feels as though I've been here for awhile.
The Bible speaks a great deal about encouragement, and Jesus told us to encourage each other all the more as we see that final day approaching. I was swimming my usual laps today at the pool, water mist and oxygen coming out of my mouth as my arms moved waves of water and my feet fluttered. Staring at white ceiling tiles with hints of rusty hues for any amount of time will lead to depth of thought. And it was in this chlorinated, quiet place that the Lord showed me something sweet.
Whether you just read this blog, throw up a prayer for me, text me encouragement or cook amazing, low-carb food for me, thank you. Oh sure, you may think you have done nothing worthy of thanks...but you see, you have. Because every lap I swim, you swim with me. Every time I lift those weights that seem featherless compared to the weight of the burden of my health, you lift it with me. Every time I go just a minute longer, a minute harder on the machine, you go with me. Every time I turn away that tempting piece of food that promises false comfort and pleasure, you say no with me. (Which by the way, I am convinced that Eve bit into a caramel apple from that tree, I'm just saying!) A little encouragement goes a long way, it's true. We have, that is you and I, have proven it to be so.
I have never been this consistent in my working out. Typically after 2 weeks, maybe 3, I run into physical problems and quit. 6 days a week at the gym with cardio and weights, I'm still going strong. I am eating food, healthy foods, that before I would have never touched...and actually enjoy them. I wake up feeling confident, for the first time in perhaps years. And with the strength and grace given to me by God to walk this thing out, I have lost 25 pounds. I now 157 pounds to lose. I give all glory and honor to Jesus, who is making ALL things new, even me. And to you, thank you. May you be blessed abundantly beyond measure and given grace to do what it is He is calling you to do...for me, it's to continue on gaining by losing.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Self-Destruct
Self-destruct; these are powerful words, yet an even more threatening way of life for so many. I was struck by this thought the other day after a long, draining day. I had a cut of meat that I had never eaten and/or cooked before. After spending time cooking it, the meat ended up being as rubbery as my front tire and as red as my cheeks after a day in the west Texas sun. I was frustrated, tired, and hungry. With the clock reading 9:45 p.m. at this point, I simply gave in. I quit.
It was then that I began to long for what I could not have, something bad. All I wanted was a slice of bread, a piece of cake, something!! In my mind, I began to self-destruct. Reaching in the fridge for a sugar-free jello, I spooned down the wiggly, jiggly nonsense as I battled in my mind. Was it worth it to cave in? Would I backtrack for just a split second to satisfy some small craving of the flesh? Would it be worth it in the end? I began to think about all of the hard work I had put in thus far, every tear, every drop of sweat, every no to temptation that knocked on my door.
I wonder how many of us self-destruct in such moments. Oh sure, it looks different for everyone. Some self-destruct their bodies through alcohol abuse or nicotine use, some through food addiction and/or starvation, some in just their very thoughts of themselves...self-loathing and self-hatred. Yet, in those noisy moments of battle and destruction, there is still a greater voice that calls out louder...one of confidence and strength. It's the champion within that beckons us to stop, to just wait, dig deeper and push harder. And soon enough, what was once a moment of self-destruction is now a lifetime of overcoming. With the grace and strength of Jesus, every self-destructer can become an overcomer...it's just a matter of which voice you are listening to.
It was then that I began to long for what I could not have, something bad. All I wanted was a slice of bread, a piece of cake, something!! In my mind, I began to self-destruct. Reaching in the fridge for a sugar-free jello, I spooned down the wiggly, jiggly nonsense as I battled in my mind. Was it worth it to cave in? Would I backtrack for just a split second to satisfy some small craving of the flesh? Would it be worth it in the end? I began to think about all of the hard work I had put in thus far, every tear, every drop of sweat, every no to temptation that knocked on my door.
I wonder how many of us self-destruct in such moments. Oh sure, it looks different for everyone. Some self-destruct their bodies through alcohol abuse or nicotine use, some through food addiction and/or starvation, some in just their very thoughts of themselves...self-loathing and self-hatred. Yet, in those noisy moments of battle and destruction, there is still a greater voice that calls out louder...one of confidence and strength. It's the champion within that beckons us to stop, to just wait, dig deeper and push harder. And soon enough, what was once a moment of self-destruction is now a lifetime of overcoming. With the grace and strength of Jesus, every self-destructer can become an overcomer...it's just a matter of which voice you are listening to.
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Grace
Well here it is the end of yet another week, spending some time reflecting before looking ahead at what's to come. I am amazed at the journey the Lord has brought me on, full up ups and full of some downs. When I first laced up my shoe and stepped onto the elliptical, I never would have thought that I would be where I am today. There are some variables that change along the way, but the purpose remains the same. There was one lesson in particular that I needed to learn this week, and what a difference I believe it will make in the long run as I continue to move forward: Grace.
I started a new plan this week where I am limited to some foods and find myself counting carbs. It had been a long day and my body was going through some withdrawals, so when I got home I knew I just needed to eat something and quickly. I ate a pork chop and had one of those mini corn on the cobs. The next day I was tallying up my totals and I went over my limit. Was it because I ate that ice cream cone or had a side of fries? No, it was because of some stinkin' midget corn. I was mad, frustrated, and ready to throw in the sweat towel as feelings of failure covered me like a husk to the corn cob. But then a sister reminded me, grace. It's ok, we all make mistakes...it is how we learn the lessons of life.
We have all heard the saying before, "We are our own worst enemies." Grace contradicts every perfectionist fiber within our beings, it challenges every prideful bone in our bodies, and it cries out for the inner champions of our souls. Why? Because winners are not perfectionists, but only losers who kept trying again and again because of grace. It beckons us to stand up and say, I made a mistake...but to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Ah yes, grace. And what a difference a little grace makes as we dust the dirt from our knees and get back up again.
I have a new number: 163. Yes, I only 163 pounds left to lose! But perhaps more fun than that, is a verse the Lord gave me as I was thinking and praying about what to write today:
"As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight." Psalm 16:3
When you reach new goals and lose that weight or set a personal best while running, I pray you sense the Lord's delight in you. And when you fall down and scrape your knee and hang your head in disappointment, may He reassure you with His grace and be the lifter of your head, reminding you of His delight in you! Oh what a blessing beyond words it is to experience the Father's delight in you, just you...
I started a new plan this week where I am limited to some foods and find myself counting carbs. It had been a long day and my body was going through some withdrawals, so when I got home I knew I just needed to eat something and quickly. I ate a pork chop and had one of those mini corn on the cobs. The next day I was tallying up my totals and I went over my limit. Was it because I ate that ice cream cone or had a side of fries? No, it was because of some stinkin' midget corn. I was mad, frustrated, and ready to throw in the sweat towel as feelings of failure covered me like a husk to the corn cob. But then a sister reminded me, grace. It's ok, we all make mistakes...it is how we learn the lessons of life.
We have all heard the saying before, "We are our own worst enemies." Grace contradicts every perfectionist fiber within our beings, it challenges every prideful bone in our bodies, and it cries out for the inner champions of our souls. Why? Because winners are not perfectionists, but only losers who kept trying again and again because of grace. It beckons us to stand up and say, I made a mistake...but to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Ah yes, grace. And what a difference a little grace makes as we dust the dirt from our knees and get back up again.
I have a new number: 163. Yes, I only 163 pounds left to lose! But perhaps more fun than that, is a verse the Lord gave me as I was thinking and praying about what to write today:
"As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight." Psalm 16:3
When you reach new goals and lose that weight or set a personal best while running, I pray you sense the Lord's delight in you. And when you fall down and scrape your knee and hang your head in disappointment, may He reassure you with His grace and be the lifter of your head, reminding you of His delight in you! Oh what a blessing beyond words it is to experience the Father's delight in you, just you...
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